Two Fine Lovers

The Adventures of BunnyCat

Monday, July 10, 2006

WoMan vs. Herself

grr. Ive been praying alot lateley about my attitude. I seem to allow anger to be triggered too easily these days. Especially at work. I love my job and what I do, but I am usualy the only person there and responsible for everything that happens. So I am tempted to feel sorry for myself and unappreciated and taken advantage of - at least that is how I justify being and assface.

So this morning I armed myself with prayer and an earnest attempt to not overeact or be too self involved. Last week I had left my employer ( and friend) a card at her home about how much I appreciate her friendship and what not and apoligizing for a terrible attitude the week before that we had worked together. She returns today from a week long vacation, these days can be a real test.. Alot of catchup and explaining to do - and in my mind proving myself.
I felt so good about making the right decision with the card, but now I am wishing it were not out there because what if I totaly screw up again and behave badly? Now that I have made the decision to be good, I have to be good. I just dont trust myself I guess. I have become too comfortable with the other angry me. Its like I see it as my right to act the way I want because of how hard I work here.

Here's to defying my flesh and really giving humility a try!


Blogger Katrina said...

This really hit home with me. I also struggle with my attitude sometimes. It's so easy to get wrapped up in myself and my worries, and sometimes I even find myself snapping at the kids for no good reason, especially when I'm stressed.

That was such a big-hearted thing to do, sending that card. I'm sure it meant a lot to your friend. I'll be praying for both our struggles!

3:51 PM  

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